Dear God, today I’m not so sure we’re ok. I don’t understand what’s going on in my life or what it is you want me to do. Love my enemies. Surrender. Trust. Have faith. Develop a personal relationship? How can I? These buzz words and phrases I get tired of hearing. Tired of trying to achieve. I’m afraid I don’t measure up. I haven’t been praying as I usually do…does that offend you? Is my faith too weak and scattered? How can I be what you want if your standards are impossible to reach? I’m human. I don’t have the strength to handle what you’ve dealt me. It’s too much. My plate is full. It’s overflowing actually…it’s been dropped all over the floor and I’m crying over the mess of gunk I now have to clean up as well. I don’t know how to stand tall and reflect what you need me to because I feel like I am the epitome of darkness. My life is a mess. It wasn’t my plan. I tried to stop it but I failed. I tried to cover it but my blanket is too small. I’m trying to hide but exposure screams and beckons me like a fire does a moth but then it burns me up. Memories are flashing again and dreams are haunting and terrorizing me in my sleep. I don’t know what they mean. Why are they here again? What do I do? Where do I go from here? I have a million choices to make and I can’t hear your voice or know what you want me to do. I’m stuck. I’m lost. And I’m scared.

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28 thoughts on “Please Rescue Me…

    1. I really try not to, but I do get angry with God sometimes. I retreat though and continue to hold fast to my faith and His promises and hope the other side of this is coming soon and it will all work out for my good in the end…you know the part where it’s all unicorns and rainbows and I live happily ever after, right? But sometimes I feel like it’s a sick and twisted way to have to get there…and that’s the part about Him I don’t always understand.

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      1. I just don’t pray any more at all. Loser used to criticize me for my beliefs. One of the last times I saw him, he asked me if I still prayed. I told him no and he said that he prayed every night….and he prayed for me. Now…this is coming from a man who once called himself God. I have to say…when he told me that he prayed for me…it made me sick…what was he praying for?….that I wouldn’t (once again) hold his lying, cheating, disease-giving ways against him? Was he praying that I would allow him to bring his latest tramp to my house, let them both stay there and sleep in my bed together, while I slept on the sofa? (He actually thought that was going to happen.)

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      2. Cheaters are delusional. I would guess he was saying that to rattle you and manipulate you. He will do and say anything to make himself look better than you. I have lots more I could say but I won’t. I’m sorry he was unfaithful. You are strong and wise to have left him.

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  1. When I read about your pain from too much loss in your life, I can feel the crushing pain in your soul. My heart can relate. It makes me feel so sad for you. I can feel you falling and I wish I could catch you!

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  2. I have been in the same place as you with all those confusing mixtures of emotions not know what to do. What God has told me, and what I am learning is that God wants me to rest and just let Him love on me during this time. I hope you can find that rest also.

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  3. I’m so sorry for all that you are going through. I know from my own experiences it is a terrible place to be. I know that I’ll never be able to measure up. I’m not even gonna try. I don’t think we are supposed to. Jesus death was enough to cover all our shortcomings. Praying for His grace and comfort to give you peace

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  4. 2 Corinthians 1:3-7…..

    3 Praised be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of tender mercies and the God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our trials so that we may be able to comfort others in any sort of trial with the comfort that we receive from God. 5 For just as the sufferings for the Christ abound in us, so the comfort we receive through the Christ also abounds. 6 Now if we face trials, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are being comforted, it is for your comfort, which acts to help you to endure the same sufferings that we also suffer. 7 And our hope for you is unwavering, knowing as we do that just as you share in the sufferings, so you will also share in the comfort.
    The Almighty is a God of Comfort. This is Apostle Paul writing. He and other apostles had faced death. He writes reminding the congregation in Corinth that the trials that they went through should be a comfort. How? Even though they were in such dire straits God gave them comfort and encouragement through others. If God IS the God of all comfort then he would never let you suffer beyond what you can bear. (1 Corinthians 10:13). Revelation 12:12 explains why we are experiencing so many trials. Please keep calling out to God. He does hear you and he does want to help you.

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  5. I’m sorry you’re having such a hard time. I used to feel that way a lot too. Which is why I’ve given up on my faith and belief in God. But I don’t want to go into that, because we all have our own beliefs and I don’t want to bring someone’s faith down just because I don’t have it anymore. I hope you find some comfort soon. ❤

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  6. I hear your anger and your pain. And I get the feelings so deep and strong that you don’t think God can handle them. BUT I would encourage you to reconsider.

    David was a man after God’s own heart. He had his highs and his lows, including adultery and murder. Throughout the Psalms we can see his prayers. He tells God exactly how he feels, to the point of requesting death for his enemies. But then he also refocuses on what he knows to be true about God.

    And don’t feel you have to follow a formula. I have friends who do best setting a timer for 20 minutes every day at the same time. Personally, I prefer to keep a running dialog.

    The important thing is that you keep communicating with God who created the whole universe and still knew you as you were forming in your mother’s womb. He promises to work all things for our good; we just might not have His perspective at the time.

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    1. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and encouragement. I too keep a running dialog going. Times of frustration like this come and go. I write 95% of it down so when I go back and read I see clearly where He has worked and answered my prayers. I always tell God exactly how I feel. It wouldn’t be a genuine relationship to me if I didn’t.

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  7. “Dear God, today I’m not so sure we’re ok. I don’t understand what’s going on in my life or what it is you want me to do.”– This is a perfect prayer for someone who is broken for it is when we reach that point of brokenness that God shows up to show off. I pray that He will bring healing and restoration to you… for I understand because I have been there too.

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  8. I have written to you on “your about” also will follow in order to comment helpfully on your journey towards Happiness ~ You will get there. Hope and Faith ❤
    I see many articles, and time is limited for me to go through all of them in so many sites. As I am writing, studying also sometimes it's too upsetting to read through such pain. Why ? As I know most of it too. Crying living without hope !!!
    I have covered a lot on what you are writing about. Its not my wanting to add followers, But my sole intention is to help others through, "My Experiences" and I see that there is much for you also to read in them 🙂
    Will you read my article about,"The Value of Prayers" ? It doesn't matter for me if anyone doesn't comment, although any views are helpful to make the site better. Also I have written about "Trauma" I am a much more mature person who has passed halfway mark in life. This is why I tell all the young crowd to read. In addition to all what I have gone through, I have experience as well as, "Proof" that with Time and Effort one can walk out of all these difficult situations to lead a much more Happier and Peaceful Life. Many Blessings of Love, Light and Healing Energies from me 🙂 ❤

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  9. I feel your predicament… I go through periods of self loathing and hate on a regular basis, but my confidence is in the GOD who forgave the people who nailed him on the cross. So hang in there , trust in grace and devine providence

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